Thursday, October 20, 2005

When will librarians learn?

I had a run-in with a librarian today. They thought they could pronounce on the matter of literature. They also had one of their fictions to peruse, it was worthless.

Librarians are to books as waiting staff are to food. They fetch and carry it and that is all. If they do a good job, it is only inasmuch as they brought the right thing and were quick about it.


Blogger g said...

Whoa! I've got family in the business, as it were. While your certainly not far off of the mark about many of the people who take cash in exchange for shuffling books at your local branch, there is another breed. True story: a certain blood-related librarian has a philosophy about the relationship between statistics and mathematics, namely that they ain't related. The books in her section (a vigilantly guarded science and math) are sorted by relative merit -- Dewey decimals be damned. Here's the scary part -- merit has been determined by careful review of the book...

Other services this relative provides to an undeserving public: thwarting those who would use pages for sanitary actions after bowel movements, which may or may not have occured in a lavatory, and fighting of hordes of would be teen fornicators who seek passion between the stacks. Oh, and make offers that cannot be refused to those who would sneek a peek at just what it was little Timmy checked out last Thursday.

So, yes, I feel your pain and busting some gung fu at the appropriate time is certainly in order. However, I'd urge you to focus your righteous contempt upon the individual shithead, and not the noble profession.

9:39 PM  
Blogger kingfelix said...


you are right. i tend to take it for granted that those not tainted by my aspersions will not feel hurt by them, the same way that quiet thin americans are not hurt by criticisms of loud fat americans. you're right. i should end all insults with:

these insults intended only for those whose conduct merits them - everyone else is to maintain a holding pattern, my insult for you will arrive at some point.

i am turning into that mean-spirited alien in douglas adams books, who travels the galaxy insulting everyone in alphabetical order.

9:47 PM  

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